Dear mhdhamood,
1- In case of seismic loading, the shearwall will take high moment and high shear.
In case of seismic, it is not necessary that the design combination will be tension. If you talking about alone seismic load case, it can be tension. but when you design for load combs, it can be tension if seismic increases from DL and compression if not.
3- First of all you need to check the punching of slab for gravity loading. The thing which you are saying is 100% correct. But what your senior saying is also correct. I ll explain.
What your senior are saying: This is right but not for code based design. You do not need to design the thickness of slab for seismic as in ACI code, you can design the members for gravity loading for the structures which are in high seismic areas ACI 21.13. You are designing the slab for out of plane forces. AND these out of plane forces as per ACI 21.13 we can design for gravity loading including shear and flexure.
What you are saying: BUT you need to design the slab (diaphragm design) for inplane forces which are based on seismic demand. So yiu are not required to provide the thickness of slab for seismic loading as it will be out of plane forces. But you need to design this slab near shearwall are for inplane forces
Now what you are saying is the next step. After providing the thickness of slab on gravity loading, we need to check the thickness of slab by checking it on slab beam behaviour and checking its rotation which is the next step and its details are not given in any code. There are guidelines which can be used to check these details like ATC 72.
Thanks
Muneeb